These are the sentences that you should avoid saying to your son when he is angry, since you will only increase his anger and make him repress his emotions
Many parents do not know how to react to their little ones’ tantrums, in fact sometimes it seems that anger is contagious and all parties end up upset. Taking deep breaths, trying to stay calm, and avoiding saying the phrases I’m going to mention could help you reduce your child’s anger.
It is impossible for your child not to have one or another tantrum, however calm he may be, he will always have a moment of courage. An angry child is like a whirlpool, unable to control his emotions . And sometimes trying to stop him will be a challenge, so know what you should never say to an angry child.
You must bear in mind that there are words capable of generating many emotions, softening them or otherwise making the situation worse. So if you try to stop your little whirlwind with an inappropriate word, their negative emotions will multiply. That is why you must know the phrases that you should never say to an angry child.
Do not be angry that there is no reason: It may not be enough for you, but for him it is of the utmost importance. Remember that their world is different and their scale of values too. Instead of making him feel worthless, you can help him channel his anger.
Stop throwing things: It will be the first impulse, when the little one gets upset he will start throwing everything in his path. However, you should never forbid him to do so. At that moment the child will see that prohibition as one more threat and it is most likely that his courage will increase.
Don’t even think of hitting someone!: If in the middle of his anger the little one starts hitting, it’s normal that you want him not to do it. But at that moment the little one will not understand it and his anger will get bigger. This phrase sounds threatening and violent. It is better that you try to explain this to him without shouting, seriously but without threats. He tries to explain to him that he doesn’t hit, that we all get upset, but hitting is not good.
Big boys don’t cry, so stop crying!: You agree this is a big lie. You should not make the little one suppress his emotions. The little one will think that his feelings should not be externalized, that he should "keep them" and therefore sacrifice himself and feel great anguish and pain inside before letting them out.
Stop complaining!: It is not good that you are pointing out to the child those things that he does wrong, that he should not express his anger or what he feels. Instead, you should teach him other ways to complain.
You are impossible or you are a monster: You must keep in mind that what your child needs in a moment of uncontrollable anger is understanding, not criticism of this type, which is destructive. In the end you will end up believing that it is true and that there is no solution. That will make the situation worse.